So….I have decided that I am no longer going to entertain a certain gentleman’s text messages. I am over it…tired, bored and in need of something real.
Holiday Fun and Learning to Let Go
I had an amazing Thanksgiving Holiday Weekend!! The time away with my family was really needed. Being home now, I realize that I miss and love them more and more each day. I am a pretty lucky person as I have a great family! I might not say it or think it all the time; however I am very thankful for the parents, siblings, grandparents, aunts, uncles and cousins, God has bestowed upon me.
I also got to spend some time with a few old friends…and even was hit up by an old flame. You know, life sometimes is funny! What is it about the Holidays that makes people nostalgic for days gone by…aka the past?
I know sometimes I am guilty of this; however I try my best and hardest not to actually make that phone call or send that text. What’s the point? An Ex is an Ex for a reason, right? The funny thing is that this Ex has a particular pattern…I typically get a text message, email or note on facebook either around his birthday (which is in February) or my birthday and/or around Thanksgiving or Christmas. He’s so predictable like that and I do not know if he is aware that A.) He has this pattern or B.) That I know about this pattern or C.) That I wish he would just leave me alone.
I know I ALWAYS have the option to not respond or engage in any kind of communication with him…however what fun would that be, right? WRONG!! I am slowly starting to realize that it is time to start letting go. Not just of him, but of the old person I used to be and all of the things that come with it…such as old friends, memories (both good and bad), habits and behaviors. There is a new ME emerging and I am quite excited about these new changes. At least, most of the time, I am.
But I found a wonderful passage that helped me put things into perspective:
“In life, there’s many things that we have to learn to let go. We have to let go of situations, things, memories, people and even ourselves.
It’s easy to form an attachment to people and things. When you’ve formed an attachment to people and things, it can be a very painful experience and feeling when you realized that it’s time to let go. Even the mere thought of not having that person or thing in your life just squeezes your heart in pain.
However, there are times where you or that person has changed to the extent that it’s necessary to let go of the relationship or friendship, so that each of you can fulfill your life path.
Letting go of your past and memories are also extremely hard. Even though old memories can be tormenting, yet you might hold on to the past and refuse to move forward. However, by refusing to let go of the painful past, it’ll serve as a roadblock to love.
Letting go of your old self and the process of letting the new you emerge can be one of the scariest experiences in your life. But by leaving behind your old self and taking a leap of faith into the unknown, it might just reveal what you are truly capable of becoming.“
Change can be a scary and isolating thing to experience; although it is needed from time to time. I am hoping that the changes and decisions I am making now, will place me on a path of happiness and contentment. As the year winds down…here’s to not waiting until New Year’s Eve to start making changes!!
Missing in Action….
Yes, I know…I have been MIA for a while…but I am back. Honestly, I wish I could say I was doing an amazing thing, like traveling the world or working with the earthquake survivors in Haiti however, I have just been swamped with work, school and life events. Long story short…I got back together with the older gentleman I was dating a while back. Things were going well for a while, but now I am in a very uncomfortable situation and I do not know how to get out of it. Don’t get me wrong, I love him…God knows I love him…I just don’t like him most of the time. I don’t like how he behaves or how he talks to me sometimes. I’m starting to feel like he is taking me and our relationship for granted and I am not happy about it. I’ve even started communicating with the ex I was begging to stop emailing me…not a good sign…I know. God…when it rains it really pours…as school and work have really been kicking my butt lately. Sigh, I need a vacation…a real like two to three-week, tropical adventure with no cell phone or laptop. But with all of that said…I am really lucky…I have my health, family, a job, good friends and a home. So thank you for reading…but I really need to just stop complaining and just get it together.
Over it…Again…
This is a repost…but it is so relevant to what’s going on in my life right now…
I realized today, that I have a problem with saying NO! I really need to try to work on this, as it has contributed to my feelings of being stressed, tired, overwhelmed and underappreciated.
I need to learn to take a more passive role sometimes. I do not always have to be the leader, president, coördinator or committee chair. Sometimes, I can should just be a member, so I can come and go as I please, like everyone else.
Being the president of any organization full of people, you do not care for or think highly of, can be and is very challenging. I feel like every idea or activity I propose, someone is there, looming in the corner to undermine me or interject some negative comment.
I just don’t understand why some people choose to be in organizations…when they know all they want is another notch on their resumé or CV or control…most of the people who are serving in this organization claim they are too busy, overwhelmed or just not interested…again I ask you…why did you volunteer to be on this board? And why would you get upset about tasks being completed, that you were supposed to do and did not do. I’m so over it…sometimes, it is better to know when to step aside or let things go.
The time is now…I’m ready to let things go so I can begin to focus on myself…
